


The Biscuit Duels

by Winxhelina



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Friendship, Games, Gen, Humor, a bit of ridiculousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:27:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28369848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winxhelina/pseuds/Winxhelina
Summary: Kaiba breaks his leg and Atem visits to keep him company. He brings along a pack of cookies and due to form the boys manage to turn this into a challenge.
Relationships: Kaiba Seto & Yami Yuugi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 11





	The Biscuit Duels

"It's _you._ " 

The former Pharaoh wasn't sure whether or not Kaiba's tone had a hint of appreciativeness to it or if he was imagining things. Either way, the sharp tone of his rival's voice was more comforting than it was alarming. It told him that apart from broken bones he was fine. 

"Yes. Mokuba invited me. Thinking you may be bored." Yugi had then eagerly convinced him that going was a good idea and that it should be him to show, not Yugi himself. 

Kaiba huffed: "Nonsense." 

"He said the last time he left you alone, he found you attempting to climb on top of the kitchen counter to -,"

Kaiba didn't let the other man finish, waving him off: "The boy worries too much. I have maids at my beck and call. I promised to call them if I need anything and I need no entertaining. I am perfectly capable of entertaining myself. However if you've come to duel, I'll accept your challenge. My ability to stand does not affect my ability to duel, even if some of the dramatic flair is lost."

"I would have thought that after what happened you might be inclined to turn down the drama a notch."

"Ah," Kaiba looked almost wounded and Yami wondered if he should have not brought it up: "So you too, have come to mock me."

"Not at all!" Yami argued quickly, horrified and frankly hurt that his friendly social call would be seen as an attempt to ridicule the man he respected above most: "Wait - _too_?"

"The loser dog has been calling me non-stop. He finds the whole ordeal hilarious. We'll see how funny he finds it when I break his leg in four places." 

"Kaiba, I shall allow you to do no such thing. What happened to you was an accident. It wasn't even remotely his fault. He wasn't anywhere near you. You were the one who jumped out of a flying plane whilst announcing your next tournament." 

Kaiba shrugged: "It gave the tournament plenty of publicity. They showed the clip in the news for several days." 

"Oh, I know," Yami couldn't help but smirk. 

Kaiba, of course, noticed: "What?"

"Nothing. Just - Jounouchi recorded the whole thing on VHS and sent a copy to all of his friends." 

"Oh not just his friends. I assume he titled all of them _Things to Watch When Your Feeling Down_ or was that just mine?" Kaiba asked drily, producing the said VHS tape from inside the drawer of his bedside table. 

Yami burst out laughing, feeling embarrassed a moment later. This shouldn't be funny. From the looks of it Kaiba had been in tremendous pain: "No, it was all of them. Yugi and I are thinking of recording over it with something actually cheerful."

Kaiba smirked: "I got to tell him there was a spelling mistake in the title and that he can't even write one sentence correctly, so not all bad." 

Yami smiled: "I really wish you weren't always on each other's throats. You're both my friends, it puts me in an awkward situation."

His rival stared at Yami with a look of utter shock and confusion and Yami wondered what had he said that was so... _oh_. The friend bit: "Do you not...?" he decided that he didn't want to know. Kaiba would probably deny his friendship anyways and he wasn't in the mood for that, so he changed the topic: "Not to be insensitive, but why are you wearing make up?"

"Really? Laughing about the fact that your friend sent me a VHS of me screaming in agony on live television was fine, but this you think might be insensitive? I was having a livestream, where people had to pay for a chance to duel me. Went on for 6 hours." 

"Wow, you really know how to make a business opportunity out of every situation."

Kaiba's reaction was... odd and Yami wondered if he wasn't feeling all that well after all. He seemed to blush just the tiniest bit and looked away, busying himself with a cup of coffee he had on a small tray next to his bed: "I suppose. After all, doing charity is also part of good publicity." 

"Charity?"

"Mmm. All the proceeds went to charity. Mostly to various reputable charities that deal with helping children, who have lost their parents through one unfortunate event or another."

Now it was Yami's turn to blush: "Maybe we _should_ duel, that way I could maybe go five seconds without sounding like a total asshole." 

Kaiba smirked: "You _are_ rather stealing my act right now."

Yami coughed: "I am sorry, Kaiba." 

The other man simply rolled his eyes: "Oh please. My feelings remain untouched. If you believe I have such things."

"I do," Yami smiled. Desperate to change the topic then, he produced a cardboard box: "I brought cookies." 

"So you have," Kaiba agreed, taking the colourful box and turning it around in his hands: "Why?"

"They have Duel Monsters on them, I thought you might - like them," he shrugged. 

"I'm not five years old," Kaiba said, but tore the box open nonetheless. He yelled for one of his maids to make tea.

"What do you do if they're not in the yelling range? It's a big mansion."

Kaiba shrugged: "Text. E-mail. Do it myself. I can move with crutches fine, it's just a bother. Mokuba fusses, but I'm okay. "

Yami glanced at his rival's cast thoughtfully. Someone had drawn intricate beautiful designs of the Blue-Eyes White Dragon on the white cast: "Did you have an artist come and draw on your cast or something?"

Kaiba snorted, shifted on his bed, trying to sit up straighter: "No, it's Mokuba's doing. He insisted I must have everyone sign my cast, when I said I don't want that, he insisted he sign it and there was still loads of space left, so he somehow got Isono to sign it and then he decided to draw on the rest. There's some free space left, but he hasn't figured out what to do with that part yet. Well, he has time. I'll be like this for _weeks_ ," Kaiba groaned and threw his head back, staring at the ceiling. 

Yami suddenly felt even worse for finding Jounouchi's VHS tape idea funny: "You're bored."

Kaiba shrugged: "A bit. I can still work, it's all right." Kaiba wouldn't have been caught admitting it, but he seemed to find Yami's visit a great relief, maybe it even brought him some joy. A maid brought them both tea, setting it on a tray table between them. She attempted to fluff her employer's pillows and make him more comfortable, but was shooed away firmly and Yami thought, quite rudely, but he supposed Kaiba didn't want to be seen in a position where he needed help. 

As Yami picked up his cup of tea he watched Kaiba stare at a cookie version of Dark Magician, he popped it into his mouth a moment later and chewed thoughtfully, before studying the back of the biscuit box: "Do you think you could duel using these?"

* * *

Mokuba had only barely made it through the door of his mansion when he heard the unmistakeable sound of his brother dueling, he could tell by his tone, even from the hallway, where he couldn't make out exact words. Mokuba wasn't too surprised. He shouldn't really have expected Yami and Nii-sama to do anything besides dueling. He was, however, in for a surprise when he walked into his brother's room and saw no holograms. He didn't even see cards. Instead his brother and Yami were leaning over a small tray and - placing cookies on it.   
  
"I set Dark Magician in defense mode and end my turn," Yami said and sat back. 

"Hey, guys! What are you up to?!" Mokuba asked brightly, coming a little closer to try and make sense of the scene that was unfolding. 

"Yugi brought over Duel Monster themed cookies, so we decided to see if you can use them in a way Duel Monsters are supposed to be used. The results are - interesting." Kaiba explained. Mokuba could see that whatever the results were, both of them were clearly enjoying what they were doing and that made Mokuba happy. It had been his whole goal when inviting Yami over. He picked up the cookie box and studied it: "There are only 6 types of cookies. And 2 of them are spell and trap cards.. ehm - cookies?"  
  
"Yes. It required for some rather drastic re-writing of the rules," Kaiba admitted as he reached into the cookie box to draw his next cookie. Because the cookies were shaped like the monsters, both Yami and Kaiba took great care to hide their hand with their other hand, so their opponent wouldn't be able to read the other's hand too easily. 

"I attack your Dark Magician with my Blue Eyes White Dragon. What's that - number 14 in the graveyard now?" Kaiba asked while reaching for a marker on his bedside table and drawing a line on his arm, it was already covered in neat little lines. 

"Yes. 6 in yours, 8 in mine," Yami agreed, eating his Dark Magician now that it was out of the game.

"Wait, what - is the graveyard your stomachs?" Mokuba asked. 

"Yes. We just eat anything that's out of the game," Yami replied.

"And what happens when you need to Special Summon from the Graveyard?"

"We don't," Kaiba snorted: "Did you think we throw them back out or something? I end my turn." 

Mokuba shrugged: "I don't know. I know how dedicated you guys can get when playing one another. I'm glad you don't. Can I eat a cookie?"

"You can eat all the ones that get destroyed. At least on my side. I'm actually fed up with the flavour of them." 

"You can eat mine too," Yami said, a little too quickly Mokuba thought as he reached for another biscuit: "Draw!"

"Are they not good or something?" Mokuba asked carefully.

"No, they're delicious, but it's a big pack and we've been going at it for a while," Yami explained. He was smiling, or rather smirking. Mokuba knew that smile, it was his I-have-just-won-the-duel smile: "I summon Dark Magician Girl." 

Kaiba groaned: "Of course you drew her." 

Mokuba looked between the two of them, confused: "Why is that a problem? Blue Eyes White Dragon is way more powerful than Dark Magician Girl."

"Not the way we're playing it," Kaiba explained: "Because the packet only has 6 types of cookies we decided to forgo the "three copies per deck" rule. Now Dark Magician Girl's special effect means she gains an additional 300 attack points for every Dark Magician in either player's Graveyard. Between ourselves Yugi and I have 14 Dark Magicians in our Graveyards."

Mokuba gasped, doing some quick math in his head: "But that means she has 6200 attack points. How many life points on either side?"

"Yugi has 1700, I have 2200," Kaiba supplied. 

"But that means if Yugi attacks..." Mokuba trailed off, glanced over to his brother he realized he did not look like he was about to lose a duel, even one that was played with cookies instead of real cards. He looked confident. 

"I attack with my Dark Magician Girl!" Yami announced, just as proudly and loudly as he would when he would have been playing a real duel with holograms. The fact that they were in Kaiba's bedroom, sitting on his bed placing biscuits on a tray didn't seem to matter to either of them and Mokuba settled down to watch, glad he had made the obviously right call of calling Yami over. 

"I discard a Kuriboh from my hand," Kaiba announced, clearly sounding mildly put off that he had to play the fluffy little ball of a monster in the first place. Mokuba supposed if you had six cookie-types you couldn't get overly picky.

Kaiba handed his brother the Kuriboh to eat and Mokuba gladly obliged: "It's good! Sweet and cinnamon-y." 

"They're quite good. Go well with tea," he said and offered some to his brother from his own cup. Mokuba didn't comment on the fact that the tea was nearly ice cold, only concluded that they must have indeed been playing for a while. 

"Wait, wouldn't have summoning Dark Magician Girl have needed a tribute?" Mokuba asked once he had washed the cookie down with cold tea. 

"We have six cookies, three of which normally require a tribute, we're not doing tributing," his brother replied.

"We're also playing our one trap straight from the hand, because setting it would just be pointless, it would just be giving yourself away, so we're essentially using Mirror Force as a Quick-Play Spell. Even if I know now your brother has none. He would have preferred using one to using a Kuriboh," Yami added. 

"Shut up and end your turn already. It's still your move," Kaiba snapped. 

Yami obliged with a slightly put on pleasant smile: "Turn over. Your turn."

Kaiba reached for the cookie box and drew. A moment later he continued: "I play Pot of Greed and draw two - cookies." 

"What happens when you run out of cookies?" Mokuba asked.

"Same thing that happens in the real version. The first person unable to conduct their draw phase loses the game. I hope it doesn't come to that. I find deck-out victories unsatisfying." 

Yami seemed to disagree: "I like them. They're almost like a draw especially if the other person also only has one card left in their deck."

"That's _why_ I don't like them."

"But if you get to that point it proves that you're pretty much equal. And playing a game with an equal is always more fun no matter what the outcome," Yami said, pointedly making eye-contact with Kaiba and refusing to break it. Mokuba thought that had been a rather high compliment that his brother was sure to appreciate.

Kaiba, of course, didn't back down either, staring right back: "I'm not sure _fun_ is the right word, exhilarating is more like it, but I do agree."

Yami nodded, neither was looking at their hand, they seemed to have moved on from their biscuit duel to a staring contest: "Exhilarating is a good word too, yes."

Kaiba's lips twitched upwards momentarily in something that resembled a smile, a small one, but a smile nonetheless. Mokuba mentally high-fived himself, calling Yami over had been the best call. His brother had not been having a good time these past few weeks and now he was _smiling_. Granted it was a small smile, but Mokuba still felt like dancing around the room. Meanwhile Yami and Kaiba had dropped their staring contest and moved back to their original game of biscuit dueling.

"Couldn't you just tell which cookie was which by the shape of it and manipulate your draw?" Mokuba asked. 

"You could, but Kaiba and I both have too much respect for each other to cheat," Yami replied. "We both decided early on that we would always take the first one our fingers would touch." Mokuba nodded, fully content and knowing that Yami was right. He and his brother played by their own rules of respect they would not break. 

In the end they did end up with a deck out victory (with the win going to Yami). Mokuba thought he had to agree with Yami on deck out victories being good. They were the closest thing to a draw without an actual draw that the game had. Kaiba however groaned and threw himself on a pile of pillows that was meant to support him and closed his eyes: "I'm never eating another cookie ever in my life."

Yami seemed more bemused than anything: "Fine. I'll bring something else next time. I must say I also had my fill of them. Could go for something salty." 

"Do you want to stay for dinner? Have some pizza?" Mokuba offered brightly. His brother shot him a look, but Mokuba decided it was more surprised than annoyed or angry so he didn't back down. 

Yami shrugged: "Sure. I wanted to ask if you have plans for drawing on the rest of Kaiba's cast or if I could perhaps sign it?" 

Mokuba frowned: "You know it's his leg, right? I think you should ask _him_ first." 

"It's your canvas. I don't care. Whatever you say goes," Kaiba put in. 

Mokuba pretended to think about his answer for a fraction of a second: "Sure. I've been trying to get Nii-sama to have everyone sign it, but he won't budge."

"We are not having the entire staff sign the CEO's broken leg. That's ludicrous."

"That he finds ludicrous, but when I tell him that jetpacking onto a stage with a prototype we haven't yet tested is a bit reckless he throws a fit," Mokuba muttered, as Kaiba handed Yami the marker he had been using to keep count of Dark Magicians in the Graveyard. The former Pharaoh was, by now, openly laughing. 

"I do not throw fits. Ever," Kaiba argued and leaned over to see what Yami was writing. He was taking a while, clearly making sure to it looked good and that his penmanship was worthy of his rival's cast. Once he was happy with his work he handed the pen back to Kaiba. He then let Mokuba lead him to where they were having dinner, pretending they weren't both giving Kaiba the chance to hide the fact that him getting out of bed now had a lot less grace and flair to it than it would have normally had. It also gave Mokuba the chance to give Yami his heartfelt thanks for coming over.

"It's no problem. I had fun," Yami said honestly.

"He did too."

"I know."

"The last few weeks have been - hard for him. He was in a lot of pain at the beginning. I mean he insisted on getting out of the hospital the moment the doctors weren't screaming at him when he suggested it," Mokuba smirked. "I wanted to invite you over sooner, but he was in a really foul mood."

"I would have been - okay with that I think," Yami said after thinking about it for a moment: "I mean he's my friend and it's understandable to be in a bad mood when you're in pain." 

As Mokuba guided Yami to their kitchen and set the table Yami was - surprised. Sure, it was a very nice expensive looking kitchen filled with stainless steel and all sorts of fancy appliances, but it felt unexpectedly normal. 

Meanwhile Kaiba had made his way to the kitchen too and caught sight of Yami staring, looking confused: " _What_?"

"Nothing, nothing. That's where you eat?"

"Problem?" Kaiba asked, getting on a kitchen stool and grabbing a slice of pizza.

"No. I just thought you would have some sort of a long mahogany dinner table in a fancy dining room surrounded by paintings of old guys. And maids serving. "

"We have one of those, but we don't usually use it," Mokuba shrugged: "Seto has meetings in there sometimes. Also it's all pictures of himself and me."

Yami smiled and hummed taking a slice of pizza. It made sense. He didn't really see Kaiba ever glorifying anyone from his past enough to have paintings of them. Or at all really.

"Then there's the one painting of you and him dueling," Mokuba added, trying to sound nonchalant, but also clearly faking it. 

Yami glanced over to Kaiba raising an eyebrow. The other man shrugged: "You _are_ my rival after all." 

Yami nodded: "Can I see it?" 

"I don't see why not." 

Mokuba filled most of the dinner with his bright happy chatter, but even if there were silences it was comfortable and nice, Yami thought. Kaiba glanced at him every now and again and Yami thought there was something he wanted to say, but he remained mostly silent throughout the entire meal until it was nearly time for Yami to leave. He was eating the last slice of pizza when Kaiba finally spoke: "Pegasus is sending over a bunch of new board games that Industrial Illusions is considering developing. I guess he thinks that now that I can't walk fast I also have nothing better to do with my time than play his games, but he wants my opinion. Apparently. So I promised Mokuba we'd play them."

Yami wasn't sure how he was expected to comment. He thought it was a nice sentiment, but he doubted Kaiba would appreciate that so he just nodded and smiled. 

"But I suppose some of them might require a third player," he added shrugging. 

"Plus, you know, I'm at school most of the day and I have homework and all," Mokuba put in. 

Yami smiled: "I'd love to come check them out."

"Well, you can then. If you want to," Kaiba replied, feigning nonchalance a little too hard. 

Yami meanwhile got up from his seat and wiped some pizza crumbs off his leather pants: "Sounds fun. Tell me when they arrive. Thank you for dinner. It was great."

"No problem!" Mokuba said happily. He walked Yami to the door seemingly very happy and relieved that there was another date set where his brother and Yami would meet, saving him the awkwardness of having to ask again. Yami felt equally happy, he and Kaiba had rarely played anything else than Duel Monsters and they had never played a game where the stakes weren't sky-high before, but he found that his enjoyment of the game had been just the same even as biscuits had replaced holograms and he was looking forward the next time they met. 

**Author's Note:**

> So I was sick with COVID quite some time ago now (I'm all good now, been for a while). This idea came to me while I had a pretty high fever and I found it hilarious. Then I got better and still thought it was quite funny, so I decided to write it up. It took way too long for a silly story to write and I still don't think it's the finest thing ever, but I hope you enjoy it. 
> 
> I originally wanted to call Yami Atem, but then I realized calling him Yami gives everyone the chance to place this wherever in the timeline they like and also decide whether or not him and Yugi are sharing a body, because I didn't specify on purpose. I tried to leave that part vague. 
> 
> If you have any thoughts on this, please please leave them in the comments below. I love comments. Also feel free to tell me if you spot typos. Kaiba calls Yami Yugi, because... he does.


End file.
